Heart.

Wow. It's been a really long time since I've posted on here. The end of November and all of December were definitely insanely busy, but now that I'm on break I feel like my only excuse for not posting would be because I'm being lazy. But the Lord has been laying on my heart to talk about something.
And that's our hearts.
"The heart is deceitful above all things
and beyond cure.
Who can understand it?" -Jeremiah 17:9
Seems kind of different from what the world tells us, doesn't it?

I mean come on guys, we read in books, hear in songs, and on almost every TV show/movie, to follow your heart. LISTEN to your heart, etc...
Now why on earth would we do that? Don't get me wrong, I love disney movies and sappy country songs as much as the next person, but how could we follow our hearts when God's word clearly says the opposite? If you've read my blog at all, you would know that I fully believe, and have stressed over and over again how broken we are as human beings. The only way that we can know what is good and what is right is by the grace of the Holy Spirit.
"The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace." -Romans 8:6
Ultimately, our hearts nature is to chase after the desires of the flesh. Yes, Jesus is sweet and fills us with HIS will and His desire, but because we can never reach perfection in this world, our heart will not ever be fully and constantly be chasing after Him every second of the day. See, for the longest time, I tried so so hard to be perfect, and to try and be focused on the Lord 24/7. While it's always good to be chasing after the Lord, my focus became too much on reaching perfection, or, trying to, instead of God's grace. I allowed myself to become unnecessarily anxious every time I did something wrong, and I wouldn't let myself enjoy the blessings the LORD had given me, because I was too busy fretting over if the Lord was pleased with my actions or not.
Well, here's the thing. Yes, we honor the Lord when we do things for Him, and sacrifice things, and submit our will to Him. But pleasing him is a whole other thing. We PLEASE the Lord just by being a child of His. And there's this really fine line, I think, when the position of our ever-changing heart is vitally important. See, we as Christian's will ALWAYS be going through seasons-where we feel close to God, or feel like we're drifting, hearing his voice, or not. (trust me, definitely going through a season right now!!) Our hearts are ever changing. But one thing isn't changing, and that's Jesus Christ, and His GRACE! Nothing we can do or not do will ever make Him love us more, and nothing we can do can certainly ever make us love Him LESS! And I feel like this is such a foreign concept to us as humans, because we don't have the capacity to love like that-Only God does! And when we do things for the Lord, we should be doing them because we LOVE Him, not because we want to try and make Him love us more, as impossible as that is... Is your heart a heart of worship, or a heart of worry? A heart of worship, or a heart of works?
Well.
That's all I got!
I'll definitely be trying to post on here more often!

Talking to My Dad

Yayyy for another blogpost!!!


Well, God is continuing to be awesome-I mean, does he ever really stop? And has shown me and revealed to me so much this past week of school that I really don't know exactly where He's gonna take this blog post I'm writing right now. But here's where I want to start.

"Is any one of you in trouble? He should pray. Is anyone happy? Let him sing songs of praise. Is any one of you sick? he should call the elders of the church to pray over him and annoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned he will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so thatyou may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective." ~James 5:13-16


So a couple of my friends in choir hold a weekly Bible study, and a couple nights ago we talked about prayer, and what it is...and it really got my thoughts stirring, and the Holy Spirit started to do some really cool stuff.
So maybe ya'll have heard this analogy before. It's like..we all have a best friend, or a group of friends or a family member we are really close to. But what would happen if we just stopped talking to that person? if we stopped communicating with them completely? Inevitably, whether over time or quickly, depending on the relationship, that friendship would probably start to suffer a little bit.
Now think of our relationship with Christ.  How often do we go through our day, and not acknowledge The Creator of the universe at all? I have this problem-when things are good, yeah I might throw up a little thanks, a shout out to Jesus...and when things are bad I'm pretty consistent about telling him to fix the mess that I most likely made myself.  But that's exactly it. Until just recently I viewed prayer as something routine, something that I just sort of 'did' in my relationship with God.
Well if you read that passage I posted from James..you'll see that that's not what prayer is about.
Guys, prayer is a gift. Ya'll it's not something that should be viewed as a chore, or as something we HAVE to do. It's open communication with the God who loved us enough to die for us!
Think about it this way.
God sent his son to die for us, but imagine if we had no communication with Him after Christ died, If we had no communication with Christ-no solid rock  to turn to?  We aren't deserving of this communication with him at all! But the fact that God is great and loving enough to offer this gift-even though we constantly sin, and are constantly messing up...That should be enough to make us want to pray ALL THE TIME!
"I cried out to God for help; 
I cried out to God to hear me.
When I was in distress, I sought the Lord;
at night I stretched out untiring hands
and my soul refused to be comforted." -Psalm 77:1-2


Something I love about prayer, that I'm growing to love, is knowing that God hears me. And like...yeah I always knew in the back of my head that he heard my prayers..I mean we get that every sunday when we go to church practically-that God hears us. But I feel like, since we're humans, and we won't ever be able to fully comprehend Christ in so many ways..it's hard for us to get that when God says he hears us...Guys, he HEEEARRRRS US! I mean, I fully believe that when we sit down, or go for a walk, or do whatever to just spend time, intentional time, with the Lord..he's not just like.."Oh, hey, hannah wants to talk to me...Cool." Guys, I picture Him getting so pumped, so stinking EXCITED just to spend time with us-even if it is just for a small amount of time. Guys how amazing is that? That God really wants to hear what we have to say!!!! I wish I could fully appreciate that.
But here's something else cool about prayer-and praying for others specifically.
It keeps us in touch with the Lord. After going to this Bible study and learning a little about prayer, I tried something the next day, AKA yesterday, at school. I have multiple friends who aren't believers, and one in particular I walk with going to and from one of my classes. And as we walked, God put the desire in my heart to just..'shower her with prayer'. I know that may sound cheesy, but it was so fulfilling not even knowing the full extent of what was going on in her life, and just praying for God to work in her life that day. And who knows-maybe He revealed something in her heart. But throughout the day I started doing that-picking a person in my life, or even an issue in my own life...or even something I was thankful for, or something that I was upset about..and I Just told God about it or them. And guys, my joy was so much more COMPLETE! I was able to focus on the Lord in such a more real way-and prayer became a privelege..
Ya'll, prayer is so important...and it is truly, truly POWERFUL!
Love ya'll! Keep living for Christ!

Radiance

Hey guys! It's been forever since I've posted, but I'm gonna try and be more consistent.
I want to talk a little about radiance.

Radiance: brightness or light. warm, cheerful.

The first time I heard the term radiance, the first thing I thought of was the sun. I mean radiance, the word itself, isn't really a word that I regularly use every day in my vocabulary (if you do...cool!). But yeah, I thought of the sun. I know for everyone that experienced the Texas heat this summer..it was HOT! The sun was RADIANT. While I'm pretty positive nobody was walking around outside talking about how cheerful the heat was, you have to admit: the sun was noticeable. It was light.

"Therefore, let your light shine among men, so that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven." -Matthew 5:16

So I've heard that verse up there a lot in life, and legitimately right now as I'm writing this I'm beginning to see what it means to have a light that shines.
Of course, of course of COUUUURSE we are called as lovers and followers of Christ to witness, to be bold, to share the gospel and carry out Christ's great commission. And I know a lot of times I hear people say that you can do that two ways: through your words and through your actions.
Well what about the way you respond?  What about the way that you carry yourself?  Guys, here we are, and not only are we given this insane gift of having access to communicate with the creator of the universe, but we are presented with joy, unending joy, because we get to spend all of eternity with a God that loves us more than we could ever imagine-and yet we don't go through every single day completely and totally joy-filled, radiant! (granted..we're only human!)
But look at the Psalms:
"Come let us sing for joy to the Lord;
let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation.
Let us come before him with thanksgiving
and extol him with music and song." -Psalm 95:1-2
That's just one section of one Psalm out of that whole book of the Bible-the longest book of the Bible, too! It's filled with praises, and adoration to the Lord.

Guys, I want to challenge you (and myself!) to stop basing your joy on things that are circumstantial. Because while every good and perfect thing comes from the Lord, and He sure does give generously, we live in a broken world, so inevitably rough things are gonna happen-we're gonna have hard days, we're going to go through difficult times. If we allow our joy to be based on whether we are having a good day or not-we're going to fall short, and that 'joy' isn't joy anymore. It's happiness. now NOTHING is wrong with being happy, please don't get me wrong on that. But anyone can be happy-what shows radiance, what shines the light for everyone to see- is when you carry around the hope that Christ has offered us-the hope of eternal life, and you let that define the way you go about your life..people are going to notice.
We can't do this by ourselves...Pray that God can shine through you, and that He will teach you to be radiant.

With Confidence

You know what I've let my life be consumed with these past couple weeks? ha. Scratch that. Since I got home from camp? WORRY.
Needless.
Stupid.
Ridiculous worry.
I don't even know where it began.. I guess here's a good place to start. I get home from camp, and I had gone thru a lot-I learned a ton, but I had struggled hardcore and made some stupid decisions. I told myself, though, that i was done worrying about choir, that i was done worrying about things EXTERNAL. And that's what I told people. When they heard I had an audition coming up, they'd be like, "hannah, I bet you're freaking out/so stressed" and I would get frustrated and be like..no, I'm not! I've chagned!
Yeah, on the outside maybe.  But really I was lying to myself.
BUt i was still worrying about things internally. I would see my sins, all the things I was doing wrong-and the things that maybe I wasn't doing well ENOUGH. And I would sit in worry, and it sucked. It really sucked. I can honestly say I have NOT been joyful for the Lord these past couple of months. Because I've been so focused on fixing myself.
haha, wrong-check out the scriptures.
"Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of our faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water."
Hebrews 10:19-22
Guys, no stinking place in God's BOOK OF TRUTH does it say that we can only be in the presence of the Lord by our OWN works! The whole point of Christianity, the whole reason it is so different from any other religion out there is that it's by GRACE we're saved! And when Christ died, that veil that was torn, that is so IMPORTANT! We have a God that wants us JUST as we are! I don't know aboutyou, but as cool as that sounds, I still struggle with wanting to be like.. "Okay God...yeah that's great of you, but I still feel like I need to be fixed before I can come t

Filthy Rags

So I've talked about control on here before, and the issue I have with it..

But I'm gonna talk about it again.

One thing that God has really revealed to me is how desperately I feel like I have to be in control in every situation. And it seems like no matter what struggle I've gone through, I can't get it thru my big head that the Christian walk is a walk of physical blindness-where we walk by faith, and not by sight.

But I feel like thru what I'm going through lately, it might be starting to click.

So we all sin, right?

Yes. Please tell me you're nodding your head right now..Or else we may have a problem. Haha, kidding. Sort of.

But I mean that's what Romans 3:23 says.

"For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."

And I mean, I've had that literally engrained into my head since I was little and in sunday school that everyone makes mistakes,a nd we all fall short.

But here's what I'm starting to realize.

We fall so short, that man we fall short even when we don't WANT to fall short! 

(if that sentence made no sense, check out this verse-it's much more valid than I am)

"So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in y inner being I delight in God's law, but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God-through Jesus Christ our Lord!" Romans 7:21-25

So here's Paul talking, and to me he sounds a little frustrated. Earlier in the chapter, He's basically asking why he does what his flesh wants, instead of doing what his heart deeply desires-the law of the Lord.

Do ya'll ever feel like that? I know when I'm in the middle of temptation, I have a decision to make-Do I do what is glorifying to God and, you know, maybe risk a little bit of discomfort or ridicule? Or do I make the decision to do what my flesh desires-whether that be to gossip, or to watch a movie that isn't honoring to the Lord..whatever! 

And the times that I choose my flesh over the Lord, I get so ANGRY with myself. Like why can't I just do what is honoring to the Lord? Is it really that hard to just not gossip about that person, or to not put this or that before God, or not to mouth off to my parents?

Yeah, It is.

The theme of these blog posts seem to always come back to me talking about how incredibly broken we are. I mean, here we are, for the most part as followers of Christ-WANTING to do Good, but we CANT, because we are that far from Him. And no matter how hard WE try, we won't ever be able to accomplish any good thing on our own. Guys, Isaiah 64 says that OUR GOOD WORKS ARE LIKE RAGS compared to the greatness of GOD-the God who gave his only son to die for us.

So whatdo we do? Just sit in our sin, wallow in it?

No, cuz if you read the end of the verse up there, what does it say?

"Thanks be to God, through Jesus Christ our Lord!"

Before we knew Christ, ya'll there WASNT anything we could do with our sin. We were slaves to sin, it was our MASTER and we couldn't escape it-couldn't get rid of it. But with Jesus, ya'll ANYTHING is possible-He didn't die on the cross for no stinking reason. He died, conquering sin with it. And he is perfect-he lived a life completely without sin, even with temptations (forty days in the desert? NO food?)So the point is, I think, that heck to the noooo we can't escape this bondage to sin by ourselves-we can only do it with Jesus. Does that mean that by relying on Jesus, we won't ever mess up? Noo, because we have free will, and a lot of times we're stupid sheep and make stupid decisions.

"My flesh and my heart may fail,

but God is the strength of my heart

and my portion forever."

Psalm 73:26

Earlier today when I read this, I just had to sit and let it sink in. Even though I will mess up, and I am a sinner, and I make mistakes, there is someone that won't ever fail, and someone who can fix what I mess up. And that isn't just ANY someone-Guys, it's the God of the universe. And there's something so stinking comforting about that.

But here's where the control comes in.

I've definitely had to let go of my pride these past couple weeks. Because I've had to realize that there really isn't anything I can do with my sin on my own. I can't change myself without the help of Christ-and so often getting help from Him means surrendering complete control, and swallowing my pride long enough to tell Jesus that I trust He'll take care of whatever sin, whatever junk I have.

And He will.

Because He's God.

And he is SO much greater than me.

Empty Hands

Giving up. 

Oh man, how many times have I considered that. Throughout these past weeks in school, there have been so many times when I feel overcome with temptation to just stop reading my Bible, to stop praying, to stop attempting to go out of my way to love people. I just hear that voice telling me that if I give up-it's okay, God will still love me..Life will just be easier.

Man, that voice is of the ENEMY!

"Be self controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." -1 Peter 5:8

Guys, when the word of God mentions an enemy..He means an ENEMY-especially when he's talking about Satan. This isn't petty drama that we see between kids at school. Satan will do what he can to devour us- to try and get us to give up, and to give in to him. Why? Because he's scared. Because he knows the potential of every single person in this world-their potential to bring others to Christ, and to honor the Lord in everything we do. But, like I talked about in a blog post a week or so ago- God's got this battle in the bag.

But what do we do when we feel like giving up?

What would you do if i told you that when you feel like giving up...to just give up?

Because when it gets right down to it, we're humans, and we're weak-our endurance in the race we're running for Christ wont last us long, especially when we're under attack. 

Really, when I started feeling tempted to become complacent again, I had to take off my cool pants and let go of my pride.I realized that I started treating my walk with the Lord like a walk by myself. I started to become so action-focused that it was no wonder I was tired-I wasn't leaning on HIM!

Okay. So back it up. At the beginning of this post I mentioned how I wanted to give up, to stop reading my bible, etc.

Yeah, there's definitely a HUGE difference between giving it up to the Lord and just giving up. But the point is that when I come to the point that I feel like I can't go on anymore, that I can't continue living for the Lord-then that's such a crucial time to go running to the Lord and His word for shelter. And there's something beautiful about that, because then it stops being about what I do-and it starts to be a healing process that Abba gets to work in me(:

When I start to feel really hardcore tempted to give up, I just have tolook at another time where things were really intense-where I was feeling really tempted to throw in the towel, I kind of just ask myself..

Well, you didn't give up then, did you?

And no, i haven't. And that's because of one reason-Jesus Christ. It seems like no matter how tired I am, no matter how weary I've become, He unfailingly supplies me with just enough to continue on in the hope I have in Him. Guys-HE SUSTAINS!

"Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall." -Psalm 55:22

"Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you." -Isaiah 46:4

Those verses offer so much comfort to me, because it is literally God promising us that until the day we die He is there, upholding us. That's why it's so important to draw near to the Lord-even, and ESPECIALLY when we feel like giving up.  God is always faithful. Who are we to question God's faithfulness, his presence, him always being with us-just because we're tired? I really do believe that when we are to the point of giving up, that's when we become completely dependent on Jesus. When we are so exhausted and tired, I think that's the best time for us to run to Jesus with empty hands. Because when our hands are empty, if we lift them up to Him..Guys, we are refilled again.

Blessed Be Your Name

So, if you've ready any of my really early posts, you know that this summer I struggled with feeling the need to quit choir.
And if you talk to me on a daily basis, or weekly, you probably know I decided not to quit.
But I started getting frustrated a few days ago. I kept reading in this book I'm reading and in the Bible about selling everything we have and giving everything to Christ and taking up our cross and following Him..
Giving him complete control.
I started to feel like God wasn't using me in choir, even though I had prayed and came to the conclusion that by staying in choir he could and most definitely WOULD use me.
I just wasn't seeing it.

today we had region phase one auditions..which if you don't know what that is, it's basically where a bunch of kids from around the region go into a blind audition(where the judges can't see you) and we sing cuts from three different songs...And they take the highest scoring singers to the next round...
So basically, it's one of the most nervewracking things of liiife.
If you let it be.
On the whole way to the school we had the audition in, I just prayed over and over again that God would allow the judges to score me the way HE wanted me to be scored, and that He would put me where I could best give glory to Him-whether that means advancing or not advancing.
And I had faith that He would do that.
After auditions like this, we get results the night of..As of right now some of my good friends are still waiting to audition (IM PRAYING FOR YALL), So yeah. I'm still waiting for those results. this time last year, waiting was the HARDESTT part of all for me..because it wasn't in my control anymore. I like being in control of things, ya'll.
But I am at SUCh peace right now, because I know with every part of me that my audition is now in GODS hands! I mean everything is always in God's hands, but now I can't do ANYTHING but trust Him.He's got such a bigger plan for this audition, and here's the thing! If I don't advance, or I don't do well, that's not going to matter a year from now, or ten years from now. What matters is what He's going to do with these results, and how this can better me as a follower of Christ, and how it can give glory to God! And if he blesses me enough to allow me to advance, THAT IS AWESOME! PRAISE THE LORD! And if he doesn't want me to advance, then He doesn't want me to advance. That's how it is, and who am I to argue with the creator of the universe?
I feel so stinking AMAZING right now, and I feel stupid for questioning that God was going to use me in choir this year, because He definitely has. AH it's so cool!

"For we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."
-2 Corinthians 4:18

I mean that verse up there kind of sums up our purpose in life in a way. We aren't here to give ourselves glory. So many times this past week gearing up for this competition I've had to check my heart and be like..Okay, am I wanting what God wants or what I want right now?
Because ultimately, always, He's going to do what He wants to do because He's GOD. And He is so good.
I think it's super important to be able to look at stuff like this-competitions, big games, sports, auditions...and not get too caught up on what WE want..Because ya'll I struggle with that SO much. But I'm learning that SO many times what I want is so different from what God knows is BEST for me.

Matthew 7 talks about putting our foundation on the rock, and not the sinking sand...Because when the storms come, the solid foundation will be the only thing that is safe.
I think that's such a cool thing to remember, but somethign so hard to remember at the same time. The Lord gives and takes away (I really like that song...Blessed be your name). And if we have our eyes fixed on things that aren't God..that thing can easily be taken from us.
But let's say I check the results tonight and I don't advance.
Yes, I will be upset, and I will be sad.
But check out James 1:2-3
"Consider it pure joy my brohters, when you face trials of many kinds. For you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance."

Annnd this verse right herrreee.

"not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance, character and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us."  Romans 5:3-5
The point is that we have SUCH a loving, awesome God, ya'll. And He does what He does not only because He can, but because He has this unconditional love for us. We call Him father for a reason. If you look at Hebrews 12, it talks about how because He is our Father, He has to discipline us sometimes. And He does that out of LOVE. 2 Corinthians 4 talks about how we're clay, and he has to mold us and form us to create us to be who we were meant to be..Being molded hurts, guys. But in the end we're something beautiful, and we belong to HIM!
But no matter what happens in life-we are to PRAISE Him, and bless His name, because He is so good. Whether life is going the way we'd like or not, we need to BLESS His name. He, the creator of the UNIVERSE deserves it more than anyone.

I love everyone reading this so much..even if i don't know you! I mean I really have no idea who reads this..But YEEAAH. I love ya'll!
For all my friends reading this that tried out for region today...Whatever happens God has GOT IT! Remember, He gives peace that this world can't offer...
Okay! Bye!(:

Peace

When I was little, I went to a private school in Dallas. Every tuesday we would have chapel and usually we would sing this song about the fruits of the spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control.

I remember as a kid always singing that song and when we would go through the list, I would always think of really silly things when it came to the word peace- peace signs, hippies...I mean, come on, I was little. I didn't understand what peace was.
I really don't think I understood what peace was until just a few days ago, and I'm still understanding it.

"Peace I leave with you: my peace I give you. I don not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." John 14:27

Jesus says it so plainly in that chapter, not to be afraid, and that he is giving us peace. In the Bible, I don't even KNOW how many times God tells us not to be afraid, and to trust in Him. He's so straightforward about it, and yet it's such a hard concept for me personally to grasp.
I get so caught up in the daily what-iffs and struggles of life, and I have a hard time getting myself to slow down and just find peace in the Lord. And, I"m not proud to admit it, but usually the reason I don't go to God immediately for whatever struggle I have is usually because I don't think that reading my Bible or praying is going to help. It's weird. I get so caught up on the fact that I know I'm going to suffer as a Christian, that I feel like I have to be worried and anxious all the time...

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, submit your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your heart and your mind in Christ Jesus."
-Philippians 4:6-7
Something I've struggled with lately is letting go of my sin and trusting God to take care of it. I'll recognize my mistakes, which is definitely a blessing, but I don't give it up to God automatically. I'll let it sit with me-I'll let myself feel guilty, or anxious. But that definitely isn't the answer! It's ridiculous for me to think that reading the Bible won't help me with what I"m struggling with- but not only is the Bible the greatest source of help-I mean, hello, it's GODS WORD! But it also offers peace.
When I start to feel anxious or guilty or I feel the weight of my struggles, I have tried to be really persistent about immediately turning to the word, even if, and especially if I feel like turning to God won't be useful. Because after even two minutes of reading God's word, I feel so much peace come over me, peace that the world can't offer!

This doesn't mean that life is going to be easy, or that our troubles will automatically go away. I think it means something even cooler-that when we do face struggles, or we feel like we have no one to turn to..guess what, we've got Jesus!
"I have told you these things so that you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." John 16:33
And that's the reason we have peace, right there. How many people can say that they have overcome the world, and them actually be speaking truth? I mean, I only know of one guy, and that's our Lord and Savior.

I want to encourage anyone who is reading this, no matter what you're going through right now, to turn to God. This world may seem like it has lots to offer, but it doesn't. The peace the world has to offer is only temporary. The peace God has is everlasting.


"Come to me, all you who are heavy and burdened and I will give you rest."
Matthew 11:38

Victorious.

I have not been posting as much as usual..which makes me sad. But here we go!

My school is huge. We have like 3500 kids, and so that means the hallways get pretty crowded...cuz the school itself..I mean it's big, but it isn't HUUUGE. So one of the biggest pains is going down the stairs or getting through the sea of people during passing period or when it's time to go home.
So the other day I was walking down our main staircase and I just saw a SEA of people-obviously, made up of teachers and staff from my school. And then God brought this verse to my head.

"By myself I have sworn, my mouth has uttered in all integrity a word that will not be revoked: Before me every knee will bow; by me every tongue will swear. They will say of me, "in the Lord alone are righteousness and strength'"  -Isaiah 45:22-24

When God's work is done here on earth, on HIS timing, every single person that has ever walked the earth will know and confess that Jesus is Lord.

And that's why our God is so great!
Jesus came, born in a manger. yeah, we hear that every Christmas time, but think about it. Even his BIRTH was a complete picture of humility. He came as a servant. One of my favorite parts of the gospels is when Jesus gets down and washes his disciples feet, a job, again, fit for a servant. And then he died for our sins.
Guys, HE is the SON OF GOD! He didn't have to be a servant, and he most certainly didn't have to die for us, but he DID.
And here's the thing.
He's coming back.
And he's coming back to DOOOMINATTTEEE..
"I saw heaven standing open and there before me was a white horse, whose rider is called faithful and true. With justice he judges and makes war. His eyes are like blazing fire and on his head are many crowns. he has a name written on him that no one knows but he himself. He is dressed in a robe dipped in blood, and his name is the Word of God. The armies of heaven were following him, riding on white horses and dressed in fine linen, white and clean. Out of his mouth comes a sharp sword with which to strike down the nations. "He will rule them with an iron scepter." He treads the winepresses of the fury of the wrath of God Almighty." Revelation 19:11-15


God is so stinking powerful, and He is SO amazing! And as followers of Christ, we can have hope because we know that the Lord is coming back, and He is completely just, and in the end every single person will confess that He is LORD! Whenever I get caught up in worries or I start to feel like Satan is winning the battle..I remind myself that God has already won! I have felt so attacked lately-with doubts, anxiety, whatever! But God is coming back, and not only is He coming back, but He's with us right now. And think about this. He isn't just 'with' us.
He KNOWS us.
He knows every single part of us.
Here's a little bit from Psalm 139!

"O Lord, You have searched me 
and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
You perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down; 
You are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O Lord."
Psalm 139:1-4

This God? he is powerful. He is all knowing. I mean you saw-Revelation 19? He pulls a sword out of HIS MOUTHH. He is the creator of the universe, and he is Holy, Holy, Holy.
And not only that, but he humbled himself and came to earth as a servant.
He died for us, because He wanted to know us. And not just 'know' us..not like mutual facebook friend kind of thing..you know, when you add someone and you just kind of know them.
No, he came so he could intimately know us.
Because he lvoes us more than we could ever imagine.
I feel like if someone were to ask me why I loved the Lord, it would be because of that reason. Because even though I'm so sinful, He still loves me...And he wants to know me..He wants to know EVERYONE.

I've gotten into this thing where I just like to go for walks. I'll sometimes take my phone and listen to music, other times I'll just walk and pray. It's just time for me to spend with God. Well today I was walking and in my head I just said, "Jesus, I love you!"
And then I realized. When I say that...I know he's answering back that He loves me too(:
This God is so big.
Tell your friends about Him.
Don't stop telling people. Because He's coming back.
He's coming back to win a war.
A war he already won.

With Open Arms

It's been a couple of days since I've posted...I usually post whatever God has taught me in my day..or days, but these past couple days it's not that God hasn't taught me anything, it's just that I wasn't sure how to get it all on the blog.
SO I'll just jump in.

So I came across Luke 15 the other day in church...I mean, that's what we were talking about..It has three different parables in it: The lost sheep, the lost coin, and the Lost son..

Lost.
That's what we are ,right? Whenever we run away from Jesus??
SO if you look at the parable of the Lost Son..(or the prodigal son), a lot of you have probably heard this parable before..
"There was a man who had two sons. The younger one said to his father, Father, give me my share of the estate. So he divided his property between them. Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living." Luke 15:11-13
So basically, this son wasn't happy at home, he wasn't satisfied, and he became greedy. So he went to good-old dad, got what he wanted and peaced out.
This sounds so familiar to me.
Imagine what the Father must have been feeling when the son approached his son, asked for his inheritance, and left..I'm sure He was heartbroken, but He let the son go..
So many times in my life I've caught myself running away from God when things get hard, or, not even that, when I see something that at the moment seems more appealing..
more appealing than being with the Creator of the UNIVERSE...
Right...
SO this son runs of and starts to party..But "After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need." (Luke 15:14)
So he runs away from his dad, and tries to live life HIS way, the way HE wants too..
Well, how well did that work out for him? He began to be in need, which speaks for itself in saying that only what the Father had to offer could satisfy.
Same in our life, right?
But I have such a hard time seeing that.
The son isn't in a very good place now in this point of the story. he's poor, and he ended up landing a job feeding the pigs...
imagine how dirty that pig pen must have been!
When we run away from the Lord, things may seem all right at first..But He is the ONLY thing that supplies our needs completely, so eventually we will BECOME needy. And because every good thing, every blessing, is from the Lord, when we run from Him often enough we will end up in that pig pen, end up in rock bottom.
But the cool thing is, when we hit that point of compete filthiness, when we have run away from the Lord...That's when we remember who God is, and how nothing completely satisfies besides Him! Does that mean that life will be perfect following Christ? Not at all! We are called to a road marked with suffering, but the cool thing is we have the Lord!

If you know the story, then you know how it ends. The son in the pig pen remembers his father, and comes to his senses..and he goes back to his home to see if his father will give him a job "like one of your hired men"
But as soon as the Father catches a glimpse of his son, he EMBRACES him, and welcomes him home...He throws a stinking PARTY for the lost son, even though the son was the one who left his father in the first place!
That's God, right there guys.
We sit here, sinning constantly and turning our backs on Christ daily, and yet the Lord still welcomes us with open arms.
His forgiveness is so overwhelming!
"Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them. Does he not leave the ninety nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it? And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders and goes home. Then he calls his friends and neighbors together and says, 'Rejoice with me; I have found my lost sheep.'" Luke 15:4-6

Love

So I have this necklace I got from camp that is just a circular washer-type thing that has 'Faith, Hope, Love" on one side, and then 1 Corinthians 13:13 on the other side. I've worn it since I got home from camp, and I think it's funny that until now I haven't really even paid attention to this verse...

"And now these three reamin: Faith, Hope and Love. But the greatest of these is Love." (1 Corinthians 13:13)

I've read over that passage before..I skimmed over it a couple nights ago, actually, and read about how the greatest of all commandments is love..Love your neighbor, love God..Yeah, cool!

Something I've noticed that I do a lot is that I tend to read the Bible and downplay what it's saying. But seriously, ya'll, when the Bible says that the greatest commandment of all is love..GOD MEANS IT! The cross is the perfect picture of love, because God sent His only son to die for us out of LOVE. If we followed a God that didn't love... imagine what life would be like! But God is perfect, and His love is PERFECT.
When life gets busy, and when I start to get stressed out or anxious, or I just get distracted and my focus shifts to something besides the Lord, I have to step back and remember, and just allow myself to realize how much God loves me to have died for me.  And it's not like I did anything to earn this. Even though I constantly mess up, and I legitimately turn my back on Him daily, He still died for me, a cause that seemed helpless. And I am helpless, we all are, without the perfect love of Christ!
So where does that leave us? Besides drowning in this AWESOME love Christ has showered us in, that is....

Earlier in chapter 13 of 1 Corinthians, listen to what Paul has to say!

"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames but have not love, I gain nothing."
1 Corinthians 13:1-3


Reading that up there really convicted me in crazy ways, guys. These past few weeks at school I felt like God just wasn't using me..I kept on praying for courage to be bold in my faith, and praying that He would offer up opportunities to take up my cross and follow Him..But I seemed to overlook the fact that, like paul says, I am NOTHING if my main goal is not to love other people...And not just people that seem easy to love. When We, as Christians make the active decision to love everyone around us, it speaks so loud. But I think it's important to remember that in order to love other people the way Christ loves, we have to love the Lord, too, and love Him with all of our heart, soul and strength. That love for the Lord WILL reflect in our lives, and give us encouragement to go out and love other people, even those who are 'hard to love'. Because when we choose to love those who may seem unlovable, or someone who has persecuted us, man that speaks so loud. And people are going to notice!!!
But I think it's important to know that this kind of love does not come from our own ability. The Holy Spirit does though, and he stinking LIVES INSIDE US! Which is so cool! Only God can give us the ability to love, and to love 'His Way'..It doesn't come from ourselves! I believe that the love God has to offer is so great, greater and brighter than anything the world has to offerBut how cool is that!

I want to encourage ya'll to love, and love well. I know it's something I definitely need to work on! Praying foryou all! Love YOUU!

Silence that Speaks

As I get to know the Lord, and develop a friendship, a deep friendship with Him, I've learned so much, and He has taught me more than I could ever have expected.

These past couple of weeks have NOT been easy. There have been mornings, like I mentioned in my past blog posts, where I seriously just want to give up and stop living for the Lord. Until recently, what kept me through this was having faith that the Lord was going to 'do something big' in my life this schoolyear.  It kept me from giving up, that hope, that expectancy...
Instead of the Lord himself, and instead of His love.
Checkout 1 Kings 19

"The LORD said, 'Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by.' Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper."
-1 Kings 19:11-12


Guys, I feel like so often I try and focus on the IMPACT of God, instead of listening to what he truly has to say. I kept on focusing on this 'big thing' I felt like the Lord had planned for my life-does He have something big planned? Man, it'd be awesome if He did. But God wants us listening in the quiet, for that gentle whisper, not just focusing on the fire an the earthquake.

And then, there's noise. I think it's so easy, living in the society we live in today, to let noise creep into our lives. That 'noise' doesn't have to be sound- it could be sin, worry, business, or just a lack of silence. Think about it. God calls us to be still in front of Him-we cant do that if we have distractions. I believe that if we were to take just thirty minutes, at least out of our day to just sit and listen in the silence for that gentle whisper, we would hear so much. But I know for me, there's something so scary about that. I mean, He's GOD..you never know what he could be calling you to do. But that's where we can begin the process of submitting ourselves to Him- by just being quiet.
I know I Like to listen to worship music- I absolutely LOVE it, and it would be a dream of mine for God to use My love of worship music in the future...But when I really sit down and read by Bible, I usually have to force myself to turn off the music and just listen to the word of God-because I never know what He truly has to say!
And I feel like when I personally start to look for God in the fire, earthquakes, etc...That's when I start to chase after God as a feeling...And I"m pretty sure I have a blog post that talks all about this-but God definitely ISNT a feeling-loving Christ is a decision, and His presence is something he CHOOSES to give us-not something that we deserve, or something we should be focusing on or feeling like we have to have...
"Be Still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations. I will be exalted in the earth."
Psalm 46:10

man, I love that verse! Be still, and find comfort in the fact that the Lord is who He says he is-HE'S GOD!!! He watches over us and loves us more than anything. He longs to transform us and make us more like Him..But we have to be listening, because what He has to say, what He wants to do in our lives..it's amazing, and it will change us. His Silence is deafening.

Created to Be Transformed

I never really know how to begin these posts..So I'll just jump in!

SO I wake up this morning, and right when I woke up, I felt more tempted than EVER to just give up and stop following God. Not to the extent that I stop believing in Him and in the BIble, but to cease to live my life for Him. The main reason for this was because I felt just super overwhelmed with guilt about the sin struggles I have, and I was tired of being 'bogged down' by this guilt, and by the need to feel perfect before a perfect God.
But what got me through that today was a couple things that the Lord revealed to me.

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:12-14

So a couple things here. Paul, the one who wrote Philippians, says that he 'presses on'.  Does this mean to go with the flow, and to live the life of following Christ comfortably? No! Pressing on, to me, sounds like endurance. And when we're talking about our walk with the Lord, we really are talking about an eternal marathon.  I mean think about this: When Jesus was going to die on the cross, walking to the hill that he was going to be crucified on, do you think that walk was easy? No! He had just been beaten, whipped, and mocked. So, no, this life we live, if we're living for Christ, is not going to be easy, because he calls us to take up our cross and follow Him (luke 9:23). But the cool thing is, we can press on because we're pressing on to become more like the creator of the universe.

Sanctification, right there baby!
"And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord who is the Spirit." 2 Corinthians 3:18

Guys, think about it! Our purpose here on this earth, the thing that should push us to do good, to love others, is to be more like Christ! He created us in His image!!! When we accept Christ, we get to begin this journey, again, this MARATHON, to become more like Him. The more we read our Bible, the more we pray and learn to just fall in love with the Lord, the more like Him we get! Because think about it! When you spend time with someone, and I mean a lot of time, you start to act like them. It's so cool to think that even though we are sinners, and we make stupid mistakes, God still works in our lives and transforms us! He doesn't just look at a mess we've made because of our sin and throw in the towel. He molds us, and transforms us!

But here's the thing:
I got really caught up in trying to be perfect for the Lord, like I talked about in the beginning of this blog post. But what I didn't realize is that, one: I'm STUPPID for thinking that I could ever be 'good enough' for God..Because it's about grace...And two: by trying to be perfect, I focused too much on my mistakes and my actions, as opposed to the love of Christ.

"forgetting what is behind and straining towards what is ahead"
^^And that's exactly what I need to do. When I let my gaze shift from the Lord, and his light, to my own mistakes and sin struggles, I'm not straining ahead. There's a huge difference, though, between recognizing my mistakes and dwelling on them.
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your heart and your mind in Christ Jesus."
Phil. 4:6-7

If you guys start to do what I do and notice your mistakes,  don't DWELL ON THEM! Just pray, pray pray! Ask God to transform you!
Remember that this transformation doesn't happen overnight. I think I jumped ahead of myself this year, and tried to do things on my own, instead of relying on the Lord...which is no bueno! But God is WORKING ya'll, whether we see it or not!
I want to encourage you to GET EXCITED that we have been created to be transformed! It's so cool! Keep pushing on, because the reward is Jesus, and,r eally, what's better than Him?

'I know the cost, he is better."

"When I am yours, then at last, I am completely myself."

I Love ya'll!

All For You.

Judges 6-7 talks about a fun guy named Gideon, who was chosen by God to lead the Israelites in battle to defeat the Midianites. Some background on Gideon.
He wasn't all that special according to the world, according to his community.  He was the 'least of his family', and his clan was one of the weaker ones at the time. When God told Gideon the plans He had for defeating the Midianites, he asked God to send him a sign to show that the Lord would be with him...So he wasn't all that confident at the beginning.
So God ends up sending multiple signs to Gideon, instead of just one. So Gideon starts to get men ready for battle against the Midianites. Here's something to know about the Midianites: They were SCARYY, and they were HUUUUGE. But Gideon gets together a pretty decent sized army...
Oh what's up? God had a different idea. While Gideon and his thousands of men were camping out at a spring, "The Lord said to Gideon, 'You have too many men for me to deliver Midian into their hands. In order that Israel may not boast against me that her own strength has saved her, announce now to the people, 'Anyone who trembles with fear may turn back and leave Mount Gilead." (Judges 7:2-3)
Okay, if I were Gideon..I'd probably be a lil' bit confused. He was probably scared enough to begin with, but now God wanted to make the army SMALLER. Yeah. I would pee my pants.
Alright.
So the army dwindles down a little bit after the men who were afraid were left. But God wasn't done yet. Two more times he decreases the amount of men in the army, to where there were only THREE HUNDRED men left.  Three hundred.  In army talk, as far as I know, that really isn't all that much.

But if you keep reading, and as you probably guessed. The small army of 300 does defeat the Midianites, and get this-they didn't even lay a FINGER on the Midianites-they turned on themselves!

Gosh, why is God so cool?
In my life, it's so easy to get caught up in trying to bring myself glory-even when it has to do with my walk with the Lord. Even when I'm not trying to bring myself glory, I'm often trying to please other people opposed to pleasing the Lord.
"Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of GOD? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ." ~Galatians 1:10

Something I've come to realize is that if I'm at school being a light for the Lord, or I'm at our school's bible study leading a lesson, or worshipping at church, or even posting on this blog..if people are looking at me saying, "wow, what Hannah is doing is so inspiring!", then I'm doing something, everything wrong. (I'm not saying people even say or think things like this about me-I have no idea). But the point is, I'm at the point now where I don't want people to look at me and see me. I want people to praise God because of what he's done in my life, or what he's done in other's lives. Because none of the good things in my life are from me-They're the Lord's. If I didn't know Jesus, I would be so lost, because..Do I really need to say it again? Probably. IM BROOOKENNN and I'm STUPPPPID.
Question:
Do you think that after the Israelites won that battle against the Midianites, they went home and patted themselves on the back? I don't think they did. I don't think they were ABLE to give themselves credit. I'm just at this place where, yeah, heck yes, I still struggle with wanting to give myself glory, but I want God to work in my life in such a crazy way that no credit can be given to me.  I want to be tested, like Gideon, where I'm standing at that spring and I realize that only the Lord can get me through the battle ahead. I want the Lord to take every good thing in my life and make it His.
Scratch that.
I want God to use every part of me, even my weaknesses! Because, he can do that you know.
But he said to me, my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." 2 Corinthians 12:9
It's time to let go, and surrender.
I'm tired of being in control.

Because it's not about what we do.

Imagine living your life in fear, completely in fear, all the time. Imagine carrying that fear around everywhere you go, and allowing yourself to be anxious in every situation.

I know that I lived that way for a long time.

I have changed so stinking much this summer. At one point I tried to sit down and write down all the things Abba has done for me this summer, and how my Lord has WORKED in my life.. But I couldn't. Every single moment I think about the way He molded me this summer, and made me HIS, a new thing is revealed to me-a new piece of truth. If I had the opportunity to sit down and tell you what the Lord has done, and what he's doing now, it would take hours. Which is so cool. SO ask me about it sometime(:

But I kind of went off on a tangent there...

Anywhoo, I have changed, and there's not any doubt in that. I know there is plenty of more room for boldness as I live my life for Him at school- but I'm hoping that people at school have noticed even a subtle difference, whether it's thru my actions or words. But I know that from the day I got home from camp session five, until just a few weeks into school, I was terrified of losing what I had learned, and losing this awesome relationship I have with Christ. I was so afraid I would slip back into the way I was.

I started to feel obligated, like I had to do things for the Lord so that he would decide to keep me around..Or maybe not even that...because that's ridiculous. I guess I felt like I HAD to do things for Him,  just to keep my relationship with Him strong. Ya'll, come on. That isn't how it works.

"The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Deuteronomy 31:8

Check out a couple things in this verse. 

"The lord HIMSELF"

Guys, think about that. Because we are followers of Christ, the holy spirit abides in us, and in our hearts. Just take a second, step back and think about that. Think about the fact that the LIVING GOD IS INSIDE YOU! The Lord Himself...Whoa. Whoa.WHOAAA.

Now look at this..

"he will NEVER leave you nor forsake you.."

Never. Does that mean..he'll try, but won't come through all the time? That he might decide to peace out and leave? That's so RIDICULOUS! Never means NOT.EVER. So think of it this way.

There's a reason why following Christ is regarded as a process of GROWTH. And there's a reason why why when we run for Christ, we aren't just running a race. We're running a marathon. There WILL be times when we mess up, and times when we lose sight of God- or even run away from Him. But it's insane to think that God would ever leave us, ever. Jesus didn't suffer the cross just to be with us some of the time. And he calls us to not live a life of fear, because he's with us. That includes being afraid of failing. Being completely honest, I had a hard time swallowing that giant pill of pride, and allowing the Lord to help me realize that, oh HEY Hannah. YOUR HUMAN! There will be times in my life where I'll try and run from God, because I"m stupid-a sheep, remember? But the cool thing is that God still uses those moments of running away to teach us something. I was so afraid of going back to when I idolized choir, and when I lived for myself.  I pray that that'll never happen again, and there is no point in allowing myself to be characterized by fear of mistakes, because helllloooo, I am going to stumble. But the Lord promises in Psalm that even though we stumble, He won't let us fall! And he promises to pick us back up(: check out the song No Far Away by Chris August (thanks for the song, Krista!)

"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord"

Romans 8:38-39

That's a pretty extensive list up there. It's so cool to think that NOTHING can separate us from the Love of Jesus, including, especially, our own mistakes. Get excited, and be encouraged. Notice when you are doing things that aren't honoring to the Lord, and repent, but know that our God is still passionately in love with us.

So.Cool.

Doubts.

Well, today has kind of not been all that amazing.
These past couple of weeks, I've been learning to put my trust in the Lord, and trying to put that trust, ONLY in the Lord. To depend on Him completely.
So today I'm sitting in world history, and we start to take notes on Buddhism, which ended up taking the whole class period. We started the notes, and I didn't think much of it. I mean I know I'm a Christian, and I thought I was pretty rooted in the fact that I know that, like Jesus says, He is the only way to the Father.
Oh, hello there, DOUBTS.
I'm sitting in class and all the sudden I'm like..
Well, how do I know that Christianity is the RIGHT religion? I mean, so many people out there believe that their religion is the RIGHT one.
In fact, how do I know I really believe ANY of this?

And that's about where I started freaking out.
My faith is just recently something I'm starting to become SO passionate about, which is such a cool thing to see. I did go through a really hard time this summer when God didn't allow passion to fuel my walk-it was a walk I had to follow out of obedience..And I feel like in a whole different way, that's what God is wanting me to do now.
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding..." -Proverbs 3:5
You guys probably know the rest. But really. God is obviously REAL, and obviously HERE, so who am I to sit here and question it? God has me in this season (though I"m praying it'll be short!) for a reason. I think it's good to question my faith to a certain extent. This doubt of whatever sort has really motivated me to dive deeper into the word, and figure out why I believe this as opposed to other religions. God really opened my eyes to the fact today that I grew up in a Christian home-I was brought up into it. Yes, it was my decision to follow Christ, but my parents were the ones that had me go to Sunday school when I was little. I think right now the Lord is wanting me to make my faith my own, or more of my own. It's so hard, because I don't want this doubt here. But it's here, and God is gonna do something in it for His glory. Isn't that cool? He can take my doubt and turn it into something awesome...
Man, God is pushing me. It's crazy.
Look at Peter.
Okay, so when I get to heaven after meeting Jesus...I really want to sit down and talk to Peter...He kind of fascinates me a little bit....(random little bit of information)
But the disciples are out on a boat one day, and they see someone who at first they think is a ghost walking on water...So they kind of freak out, until they realize it's Jesus. Even then they're still pretty scared, I'm guessing. So Peter, being..peter, decides to put himself out there and walk to Jesus on the water. And I mean, he's doing pretty good for awhile..but look at what happens.
"Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, 'Lord Save me!' Immediately, Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. 'You of little faith,', He said, 'why are you so afraid?'" Matthew 14:29-31
All we have to do is close our eyes and take a leap of faith.
Prayers would be appreciated(: love ya'll!

Why?

I kind of had to ask myself a hard question today.

Why do I live for Jesus? What's the point?

Now, I don't mean that in a negative way. It's a genuine question. Like, why did I make the decision to follow the Lord, and legit live for Him? I mean, obviously it was God who opened my heart to make this decision, but I have to wonder..

This whole time, this whole summer...

Have I been living for God just to live..for myself?

Okay, let me explain.

I absolutely love kids. And I realized this summer that I LOOOVE speaking to people about Jesus. I mean, I'm at the point where I could sit down and just talk about Jesus for hours (because he's cool, not me). So that really inspired me, and gave me the desire to, after my first year of college (...sic em, bears??) to be a counselor at Sky Ranch. That's been something I've really started to look forward to lately, even though it's all of four summers away. But lately I've realized that my motivation for spiritual growth is so I can be 'wise enough' or 'ready enough' to be a counselor at camp, and to be able to share Christ with kids.

Good intentions? Maybe.

But this definitely isn't right.

Today I finally got around to asking myself, "Why do I love Jesus? Why do I want to follow Him?"

It scared me, asking myself that question. Because the thing is, the whole point of diving deeper, in persevering through struggles, it's to be more like Jesus. I'll never be what I said above...Wise enough, ready enough. Something I loved at camp was when our counselors would talk and you would just KNOW that it was the Lord speaking through them. You know? I hope I'm making sense, cuz I'm having a hard time wording things tonight.

I think I'm scared, though. I'm scared of what becoming more like Jesus looks like. Becoming like Him means taking up our cross and following Him, which I know I want to do...But I don't know where it will lead me. I think that's where complete control comes in, or submitting complete control to Him.

It's so weird. I feel like my heart is TORN. Torn between clinging to control and just submitting myself to Him completely. I've prayed countless time for the Lord to take my life and make it His..Now I'm just waiting for the change of heart to take place. It's actually a really scary thought when you realize that you maybe haven't been living for the Lord for the right reasons. I guess I should be looking at an opportunity to be involved in ministry, or to work at a place like sky ranch as an opportunity to grow, instead of using it as something to base my faith on. Because faith should be based on the Lord!

I want.To want.to want to be like Jesus.

It's cool to know though that even through all these sin struggles, and the problems I realize I face, that the Lord still loves me the same.

How about that?<3

Obsessed.

I used to think that the phrase, "You're so obsessed with ____" was super offensive. I remember being in the car with my mom last fall/spring of freshman year, and be talking about, idk, choir auditions, results, whatever, and my mom saying that I was obsessed, obsessed with choir.
And I mean I've heard it applied to other things and circumstances..I just don't think that the word obsession has ever been appealing to me. It sort of implies desperation, complete dependence.
Well, hold on.
Isn't that what I should LONG for in my walk with the Lord?
Okay..I can't take complete credit from this blog post, I read a lot of this and got the idea for the post from 'Crazy Love', the book I just finished. But this is how I think of it...
Think about it. When you're obsessed with something, it's ALL you can talk about, and it's all you can think about. Imagine if we were obsessed with the Lord...If I were to have a friend comment at lunch, "Gosh Hannah, you're so obsessed with Jesus." I'd probably go have a party.
I'm at the point where I just want to surrender EVERYTHING. I know that there's a huge part of my life that is devoted to Christ, but I don't want that. I want ALL of my life to be devoted to him. I know that it's so easy to get caught up in the world, and I will fall down and make mistakes, but I'm so ready to think of Jesus as a best friend instead of an acquaintance.
Think of Him as a lover, not as an obligation.
But think about it. What if we were to be passionately in love with the creator of the universe?! If we were to be able to turn to him like we would turn to a best friend? Because the cool thing is that, yes, friends are awesome, and yes, that boyfriend/girlfriend is GREAT (I think it's important that if you love Jesus, they love Jesus, and you guys are pushing each other towards Christ, but that's a different story!) But the thing about a relationship with a person, a human, is that their love is going to fail us at some point, or cease to satisfy. But imagine knowing and loving a God that won't EVER fail you-why? because he's GOD!!!
Does this take time? Heck.yes. My heart is so fickle, and it chases after other things so easily. There are so many times in the day where I know in my head I should be reading my Bible, but I don't want to..I have something 'better' to do. And then once I remind myself that there is NOTHING better than the creator, I beat myself up for not loving God with all my heart and my soul and my mind, like His word tells us to do.
Here's the thing.
This love is NOT going to happen overnight. To love someone, you have to get to know them-to spend time with them on a consistent basis! And to love someone, to be obsessed with God, I believe we have to be willing to submit our whole lives and our will to the Lord-knowing that what he chooses for our lives might not be our first choice-it might be our LAST choice, the last thing we want to do. But the cool thing about a relationship with the creator is the fact that we don't have to come to Him perfect-he wants us as we are. NONE of this happens overnight. Oh, awkward, I already said that. MAYBE BECAUSE ITS IMPORTANT! I can't tell ya'll how shocked I was to go to school the first day and realize, oh crap. This loving God-being a light-loving other people-taking up my cross thing is a lot harder than I thought. Ya'll, it's not about we do, for starters. While it's important to obey God, we have to remember that nothing we can do will ever make Him love us less or more-another reason he would be the perfect lover. But I want to encourage you guys to SUBMIT your lives to Him, and allow him to transform you bit.
by bit.
by bit.
You won't be disappointed.
(:

Living Water

I'm feeling really excited about Jesus tonight, just thought I'd let ya'll know,

So all day today I was super thirsty. This morning I had orange juice (don't worry, this HAS a point!), then at lunch lemonade. I was 'too busy' to stop and get a drink from the water fountain today during class. So today I went to a friends surprise birthday party, and I got super thirsty again. Did I go and get water from the fridge? Nope! Instead I went straight to the Dr.Pepper, went thru a whole can, and then grabbed some mountain dew. But I was still thirsty. 

So a friend of mine was sitting at the table with me (SHOUT OUT TO FRANCESSS!), and she said something like, "yeah, water is the best."

So what did I do? I WENT AND GOT SOME WATER! And I wasn't thirsty anymore..shocker, right?

Okay, I know this is a super cheesy analogy, but bear with me.

So many times today I was thirsty, and I purposely chose a drink besides water. I think I do that in real life, too! 

"Jesus answered, 'Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again. But whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water, welling up to eternal life." John 4:13

This whole soda water thing today really opened my eyes to how often I search after other things to satisfy me.  Things that are of the world, be it sin or something that could be put before God-in any circumstance. And I cant help but shake my head at how STUPID I am to think that anything can satisfy, besides the water of Jesus. I mean, really, come on. And it's so easy to push God to the side, and to just make excuses. 

"I'm tired. I'll spend time with you later."

"I mean yeah, I know you're always here and everything, but I'm not really in the mood to hang out with you right now."

Ridiculous. 

Are you KIDDING me?

I get into this same tangent like every time I post on here, but GOD is more REAL than anything the world has to offer! Because at the end of the day, what's going to satisify my thirst? Not the doctor pepper, and not the mountain dew. The water.

The living water.

And the cool thing is, Jesus gives this water freely.  Who are we to push Him aside?

The creator of the universe.

The one who gives freely.

The one who loves unconditionally.

Give up, surrender to Him. He will satisfy. I promise.

(: 

Living Water

I'm feeling really excited about Jesus tonight, just thought I'd let ya'll know,

So all day today I was super thirsty. This morning I had orange juice (don't worry, this HAS a point!), then at lunch lemonade. I was 'too busy' to stop and get a drink from the water fountain today during class. So today I went to a friends surprise birthday party, and I got super thirsty again. Did I go and get water from the fridge? Nope! Instead I went straight to the Dr.Pepper, went thru a whole can, and then grabbed some mountain dew. But I was still thirsty. 

So a friend of mine was sitting at the table with me (SHOUT OUT TO FRANCESSS!), and she said something like, "yeah, water is the best."

So what did I do? I WENT AND GOT SOME WATER! And I wasn't thirsty anymore..shocker, right?

Okay, I know this is a super cheesy analogy, but bear with me.

So many times today I was thirsty, and I purposely chose a drink besides water. I think I do that in real life, too! 

"Jesus answered, 'Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again. But whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water, welling up to eternal life." John 4:13

This whole soda water thing today really opened my eyes to how often I search after other things to satisfy me.  Things that are of the world, be it sin or something that could be put before God-in any circumstance. And I cant help but shake my head at how STUPID I am to think that anything can satisfy, besides the water of Jesus. I mean, really, come on. And it's so easy to push God to the side, and to just make excuses. 

"I'm tired. I'll spend time with you later."

"I mean yeah, I know you're always here and everything, but I'm not really in the mood to hang out with you right now."

Ridiculous. 

Are you KIDDING me?

I get into this same tangent like every time I post on here, but GOD is more REAL than anything the world has to offer! Because at the end of the day, what's going to satisify my thirst? Not the doctor pepper, and not the mountain dew. The water.

The living water.

And the cool thing is, Jesus gives this water freely.  Who are we to push Him aside?

The creator of the universe.

The one who gives freely.

The one who loves unconditionally.

Give up, surrender to Him. He will satisfy. I promise.

(: 

Weird-On Whose standards?

So I'm sitting in geometry, not paying attention to geometry (what's new?), when I ask myself...
"What's so weird about talking about Jesus?"

No, really. think about it! Why is it that we, as humans, seem to look at the subject of religion as..as like taboo? Something that shouldn't be mentioned.  And, really, I'm not meaning for this to be rhetorical, I legitimately don't know the answer. Just asking that question,, though, leads me to another question:

Why is so hard to talk about Jesus, but so easy to talk about who won the last football game? What the math homework is? Why is it so easy to gossip.  If you are a follower of Christ, then you know that Christ is truth, His word is truth. So why is it so hard to talk about the truth? I'm not asking just ya'll, I'm asking myself too! it's like I sit at school and am to tempted to gossip, but my nature tells me to run away, to shy away from telling others about God, and what he has done in my life!

I guess it's because of just that. We are human, and it's going against our sinful nature by speaking of the Lord...does that SUCKKK? Yeees. But the cool thing is that Christ chooses to use us, even though we are made weak through our sin. (Check out 2Corinthians 12:9!!!) Guys, next time your friends start to talk abourt the Lord, DONT SHY AWAY! Look at it as an opportunity to take up your cross, deny yourself and follow Him. Do it, cuz it's stinking legit ya'll!(: Love you all, so very very much! Praying for you everyday!

Tired and Weary.

I'm at the point now where I just want to stop fighting. I know in my heart that my deepest desire is to live for the Lord, and die to myself completely, and I realize how I'm going against my nature-my human nature to live for myself. I want to live for the Lord-It is my greatest desire. But I've noticed that I try and take things into my own hands. I'm at a point now where I LONG to be persecuted for my faith, and I LONG to be lost in my love for Christ! But I have a hard time trusting that YES the Lord knows that I want this, and YES he will give it to me! So I go looking for oppurtunities by myself. And I get SO weary, and I start to feel obligated to do things for Him-even though, hello? I can never live to Jesus's standards, to the standard of perfection.
I'm so afraid of falling back into my old way of life, where yeah, I read my Bible, but God was just a piece of my life, not all of it. It is SUCH an easy trap to live in. I don't WANT to live life comfortably anymore, but I don't want to live life feelingn guilty and obligated. I can't tell you how many times today I felt so tempted to just give up and to give in to my old life, because I felt like that life offered more peace. YALL THAT IS SO NOT TRUE!!!! Even though that temptation scared me half to death, I'm taking joy in the fact that this race that I'm running is a test of endurance, and the fact that I'm tempted to return to my old way of life means that God is about to do something AWESOME, and Satan is scared.

I know that I"m not perfect, and I'm far, FAR from it, but I think about everything Christ went through for me, for all of us. And when he was on that cross, suffering, he was suffering for me, for all of us. I am so tired of feeling obligated to do things for Christ. That's not how it should be. I want to be at the place where I am so IN LOVE with the Lord, that it is like second nature to die to myself daily.

"Let me rediscover you.
And by your grace I'll follow through.
Tell me of the God I never knew.
Jesus let me rediscover you."

Prayers would be REALLY appreciated, ya'll!

Not By Accident.

Genisis 1:1
"In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth."

Okay, cool. A lot of us know that verse, as it's the first verse in the Bible! I know that since I went to a private school, it was one of the first verses I ever had to memorize, and I never really gave it that much thought. God created the heavens and the earth. Cool beans.
Read it again.

Genisis 1:1
"In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth."

Think about the world for a second. Think about how EXTREMELY complex it is. Now think about the universe. Think about our galaxy, and about stars. Did this really happen by accident?
Not.Likely.
So I'm reading this book right now called Crazy Love, by Francis Chan, so a lot of what I'm about to write comes from this book, just to let you know.

Caterpillars have 228 separate muscles in their head.
The average elm tree has 6 million leaves on it (that's a lot of leaves, I think).
Our own hearts generate engough pressure pumping blood that it could squirt up to 30 feet. (DISGUSTING).
Think about how diverse the earth is, and how much variety it has. There are MILLIONS of different animal species alone on this earth. Plants literally DEFY GRAVITY by bringing water upwards from the ground into their veins. How could this have happened on accident?
And think about this. When rivers flood into valleys, fields, whatever, the FISH POOP legitimately acts as a fertilizer and provides vegetation and crops.
There are so many other scientific things that I could poing out-like how complex the human eye is, and how the earth is positioned at just the right angle from the sun (or something like that). But here's the point. Stuff like this could NOT have just happened-there's something, someone greater at work.  And that's Jesus. rejoice ya'll, cuz the God of the universe-who created all this INSANE stuff wants something, everything to do with you. Even when we chase after CRAAAP-be it lying, cheating, sex, drugs, idolatry, anything- He is still chasing after us. he never grows tired, which is why he tells us to find ultimate rest in Him! He is not something that ties us down, he sets us free-free from our insecurities, free from our sin. There is nothing greater than drinking the living, soul quenching water of Christ Jesus! He loves you enough to die for you! Run towards Him-and He will allow you to hunger for more every day.
Love you(:

Rock and Sand

Dependency. 

I think I've come to the conclusion that as humans, it's our nature to depend on SOMETHING-whether it's a person, place, thing..whatever. Sure, there's people out there that are more INdependent than others, but I don't know anyone out there that deep down wants to go out and live their life by themselves without putting their trust in something...But I think the trick is putting that trust on something that sticks.

I'm sure a lot of us have heard about the wise man who built his house upon a rock, and the foolish man who built his house on the sand.  "The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house: yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock." (Matthew 7:25) 

So this past week at school I started to REALLY miss camp. It's hard to walk around in a place crowded with people where you're in an environment where not everyone necessarily loves the Lord... The great thing about camp is that everyone is running towards one common goal: Jesus. And because of that, there aren't hardly any distractions, which is GREAT. And in my cabin, I was blessed to have four amazing counselors that really, really pushed me in my walk with the Lord, which was so cool.  Towards the end of this week the Lord started to reveal to me that I was starting to make sky ranch-and my experience and the people that I was surrounded with at camp my idol. That actually really freaked me out. I'm super sensitive towards having an idolatrous mindset, because I struggled with that A TON last year with choir, and I'm super scared to fall deep in that sin. So for everyone reading this, prayers would be GREAT!

Something I'm realizing is that everything-literally, everything, is sinking sand-besides the Lord. And when that storm comes, if I'm not clinging to the Lord for dear life, I'm gonna fall into the waters. Does that mean forget about everything that I learned at camp, or cut myself off from the people that I met completely? No, absolutely not! But I believe that every good thing comes from the Lord, and he gives it to us to bring Him glory. By taking my longing to be back at camp, and my longing to be with my friends and counselors and remembering what I learned there, and thanking him for the experience I had there- that right there is giving him glory, and that I think will help me depend on Him! Ya'll, I can't shake this feeling that the Lord has something big planned for my life sophomore year. Not at all because of anything that i"ve done, but because of HIM! And I have a feeling that whatever this is is gonna be a struggle, and if that's right then I feel like the Lord is training me to keep my eyes on Him, so I know who to run to when it gets hard or trying. 

I think lately I've started to grow weary of wrestling with questions about my faith, and the purpose in my life to live for Him. I just have so many questions. But WHOA the Lord just revealed something to me! When I seek God, he will offer an answer-maybe not right away, but I will go away learning something. The more questions I wrestle with, the more I learn. Maybe that's what the Lord is doing,a nd maybe that's why i sit here wondering why I seem to struggle so much with not understanding the Lord...Because he's PREPARING me! I guess the trick is to be patient, wait and watch to see how he'll work. I know it's gonna be great.

Love you all!

I can't just sit here and deny what the Lord has done in my life-in the past summer, in the past month, in the past week. I wouldn't even know where to begin, but I'll try.

Can I just stop for a minute and brag on the Lord?? I think I will, thanks(:

GUYS DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I MESSED UP THIS WEEK?

Do you know how many times I judged someone?

How many times I looked at that person in the hall and thought something negative about someone?

How many times I pushed Christ out of the way, just so  I could feel comfortable?

Okay, yeah, you get it.

But guys, HE STILL LOVES ME! Guys, nothing can separate us from God's love-especially not our own sin. Hello? Isn't that why Jesus died in the first place? Somehow, even though I turn my back on Him every time I sin, he still looks at me and loves me? Is he shaking his head? Yes, because I"m being an IDIOT! But he still LOVES ME! I can't even really explain why this is making me so excited right now, to the point of tears. I'm not sure what to write because there aren't words to describe how in awe I am of how much he loves EVERYONE unconditionally! "The King is enthralled with your beauty. honor Him, for He is your Lord." Psalm 45:11.

WHY is the creator of the universe looking at me and calling me beautiful when all I seem to do is drive that nail deeper into his wrist? I mean, duh, it's because He's GOD. And that is so stinking legit. But flip it guys. God is perfect. Yeah, we all know that for SURE!!! And yet I went through this week at school, and so often I would think about the Lord, see something else and run after it instead of Him-because it was "more real".

Stop.

Stop.

STOP.

Maybe I"m being sassy cuz it's late, and because I'm tired. I don't think I'm usually like this. But it's all good. But seriously! GUYS. WHAT IS MORE REAL THAN A GOD WHO HAS DIED FOR US? WHat is more real than our Lord, who walked as a man on the earth (and come on, we all know that earth SUCCCKS), and then endured a more painful death than we could ever IMAGINE? And he did it for us, the broken, lost and stupid sheep. It almost leaves me speechless to think that when he died he did it for me, a sinner. 

I feel like tonight is one of those nights where I'm just blessed to feel the Lord's presence...  He is so cool, and I encourage everyone (and myself too!!!) to get to know Him more. Ugh, He loves us so much!!!!

~Hannah

It is good.

Hey everyone! I just wanted to share a story with you all!!! 

So something I haven't mentioned to the fullest extent on here is a really huge decision I had to come to during late July all the way till just before school. 

That decision was on whether or not I should quit choir, the source of my idolatry my freshman year. This decision was a huge source of my anxiety for a LONG time, and I finally came to the decision while at camp session 11 to stay in choir-but only for my sole purpose to glorify the Lord. Even though I prayed, talked to numerous counselors, and knew that my decision to stay in choir was not a wrong decision, I had a really hard time trusting that the Lord would use me in choir, and I had a hard time trusting that I was making the right decision. When I started doubting that decision, that's when I started feeling more and more anxious and bogged down.

This week at school I've been especially overwhelmed with everything going on. I had laryngitis and couldn't sing, and I had to keep myself from getting upset over that...How could I give glory to God in choir when I couldn't even sing?? I started doubting my decision this week AGAIN..But really, what could I have done about it??

So I'm on prescription medicine, and I started feeling a lot better. This morning when I woke up I was feeling like my voice was fully back, which was great! 

So I get to choir today, and we took out a piece that's based on a Psalm text-It's called shout for joy. Even though I hadn't been able to sing the past few days, we had practiced this song a few days before I was full voice, and I just LOVE it! I love the text, I love what the song means, and I love how we sound as a group and the harmonies..all that! But today I was singing, and I just thought in my head, "Okay God. This is for YOUR glory!" 

SO I started singing, and I just completely felt his presence-something I haven't felt in awhile! And as I was singing a thought came into my head."

It is good that you're here.

Guys, call me weird. But that thought was not my own! It was the Lord's! I didn't realize that it was his voice speaking to me until later on in the day, but once I knew, I knew.

I don't think I'm gonna be anxious about staying in choir anymore!!!

Today I got more satisfaction out of choir that I have EVER in my year and four days of high school! There is NOTHING greater than being surrounded by God's will, and just giving Him the glory in a situation when you're using your talents for HIM!! It's so stinking fulfilling!!! 

Love ya'll!

Enamored

So, since I'm sure everyone here can read...the title of this post is enamored. And that's exactly what I long for, what I desire.

To be enamored with Christ: to be so in awe of Him that I can't even speak. I know over the summer I've gotten to points where I feel the Lord's presence so strong that I have been brought speechless because of his greatness. Check this out, ya'll.

"I saw heaven standing open and there before me was a white horse, whose rider is called faithful and true. WIth justice he judges and makes war. His eyes are like blazing fire, and on his head are many crowns. He has a name written on him that no one knows but he himself." Revelation 19:11-12

Okay, while all that basically makes me want to pee my pants, what I think is insanely cool is this bit at the end:

"He has a name written on him that no one knows but he himself."

That just goes to show there that there is NO WORD that can fully describe Jesus Christ. Yes, he is the creator. He is awesome, Yahweh, Abba, all of those things! But he is GREATER-so great that we can't even fathom it..Which is why he is the only one that knows the name written on his robe..if that makes sense!

Do I need to say anything else, really? God is stinking legit. End of story!

Then why is it so hard for me to love Him? 

Something I've noticed that I'm having a huge problem with is focusing on my mistakes, instead of my love for Christ. I can't tell you how many times this week, in these past three days that I"ve been near tears because I feel like I'm not living well enough for the Lord. My eyes have been opened to the things that I need to work on in my walk with the Lord-loving people more, judging less, etc...But my problem? I dwell on it. I dwell on my mistakes, and I let my gaze shift from my love for the Lord- from me being ENAMORED, to my mistakes.

Life verse? Hebrews 12:2

"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, author and perfecter of our faith....." Yeah and it continues, but you get the gist.

God is forgiving. The cross? hello! duh, Hannah! If I'm focusing on my mistakes, focusing on what I have to do and what I'm doing wrong...That's not focusing on God, because news flash! I'm NOT perfect, and I'm for sure NOT God! I still haven't been able to figure out why it's so hard for me to let go of my imperfections and just focus on the awe-inspiring love of Christ. The Bible says so many times not to worry! 

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind."

I feel like if I were to just look to the Lord, and just allow myself to be enamored...So many doors would be opened! I think it's time to stop focusing on my mistakes. The key is to repent, and allow God to do away with it! He tells us to cast our cares on Him, because he will sustain us! (Psalm 55:22)

Well, that's about it for this one here... Keep reading!(: God bless!

Let's do this.

I know the Cost-He is better.

In our community, the cost is discomfort. The cost is 'offending' someone, or possibly losing a friend or two-facing persecution...

Acts 4-the disciples faced persecution to the point of death. They knew the cost. And they knew the creator of the universe was better.


I know the cost-He is better.

Made To Worship

As humans-specifically speaking about the body of Christ, we are all created differently. Well, duh. We have different spiritual gifts-different talents, and different interests and personalities. But there's one thing we all have in common.
We are made to worship..
Take a look at Psalms. It's the longest book of the Bible- and so much of it is devoted to singing praises to the Lord.  That is what we are called to do, because that's how we are made.
"So God created man in his own image,
in the image of God he created him;
male and female he created them." ~Genesis 1:27

The whole reason for our creation was so that we could glorify the Lord. But since we are human, and since we've fallen, it's impossible for us to hold our heart focused on Christ in worship every single moment of every day.  There are countless distractions that withhold us from being in constant worship with our Father. That won't change as long as we're on earth, because it's earth-and earth sucks! But the cool thing is that we don't have to live on earth forever! When it's time to go home-like our REAL home- we get to worship the Lord all the time, and it will be SO GOOD! (okay..I kind of felt like I was just preaching at a funeral there...)

But here's the thing guys! I love singing, and I love music. Just recently I figured out that there's a way to thread choir, and music in general, into a way of worshiping the Lord! I know that personally, I just tend to feel so joyful whenever I'm listening to worship music-whether I 'feel' God or not. And I think that's because I'm doing what Abba, Father has created me to do! And in choir this year, if we sing spirituals-any scripture based song, that makes me even more excited-it means I'll be singing-but singing for HIM! After all, every good and perfect thing-whether it be a gift he gives us, or a talent or whatever, is given to us so we can glorify Him! Do I have a bad habit of taking those gifts and using them for myself instead of submitting them to Him? Absolutely. That kind of applies to Luke 9-to taking up my cross and following Him, if you think about it!  Taking up my cross doesn't necessarily mean to drop everything that has given me happiness. It means to take those things-like choir,  and use it to glorify Him! Does that mean that God is going to give me everything I selfishly desire-like success in choir, according to my standards? Absolutely NOT! God is God, and God is good, and he will do whatever He needs to do in order for me to grow in Him-whether that means I go through struggles or not!  That's the only reason why we are here, and when you think about it..To worship the Lord! it's so stinking cool, cuz it reminds me how dependent I am on Him for everything I do-right down to my last breath!

So guys, I challenge you to recognize your gifts, your talents-whatever they are, and thank God for them! But don't stop there! Use your gifts as a form of worship, because in the end that's all that matters!!!