But I'm gonna talk about it again.
One thing that God has really revealed to me is how desperately I feel like I have to be in control in every situation. And it seems like no matter what struggle I've gone through, I can't get it thru my big head that the Christian walk is a walk of physical blindness-where we walk by faith, and not by sight.
But I feel like thru what I'm going through lately, it might be starting to click.
So we all sin, right?
Yes. Please tell me you're nodding your head right now..Or else we may have a problem. Haha, kidding. Sort of.
But I mean that's what Romans 3:23 says.
"For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."
And I mean, I've had that literally engrained into my head since I was little and in sunday school that everyone makes mistakes,a nd we all fall short.
But here's what I'm starting to realize.
We fall so short, that man we fall short even when we don't WANT to fall short!
(if that sentence made no sense, check out this verse-it's much more valid than I am)
"So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in y inner being I delight in God's law, but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God-through Jesus Christ our Lord!" Romans 7:21-25
So here's Paul talking, and to me he sounds a little frustrated. Earlier in the chapter, He's basically asking why he does what his flesh wants, instead of doing what his heart deeply desires-the law of the Lord.
Do ya'll ever feel like that? I know when I'm in the middle of temptation, I have a decision to make-Do I do what is glorifying to God and, you know, maybe risk a little bit of discomfort or ridicule? Or do I make the decision to do what my flesh desires-whether that be to gossip, or to watch a movie that isn't honoring to the Lord..whatever!
And the times that I choose my flesh over the Lord, I get so ANGRY with myself. Like why can't I just do what is honoring to the Lord? Is it really that hard to just not gossip about that person, or to not put this or that before God, or not to mouth off to my parents?
Yeah, It is.
The theme of these blog posts seem to always come back to me talking about how incredibly broken we are. I mean, here we are, for the most part as followers of Christ-WANTING to do Good, but we CANT, because we are that far from Him. And no matter how hard WE try, we won't ever be able to accomplish any good thing on our own. Guys, Isaiah 64 says that OUR GOOD WORKS ARE LIKE RAGS compared to the greatness of GOD-the God who gave his only son to die for us.
So whatdo we do? Just sit in our sin, wallow in it?
No, cuz if you read the end of the verse up there, what does it say?
"Thanks be to God, through Jesus Christ our Lord!"
Before we knew Christ, ya'll there WASNT anything we could do with our sin. We were slaves to sin, it was our MASTER and we couldn't escape it-couldn't get rid of it. But with Jesus, ya'll ANYTHING is possible-He didn't die on the cross for no stinking reason. He died, conquering sin with it. And he is perfect-he lived a life completely without sin, even with temptations (forty days in the desert? NO food?)So the point is, I think, that heck to the noooo we can't escape this bondage to sin by ourselves-we can only do it with Jesus. Does that mean that by relying on Jesus, we won't ever mess up? Noo, because we have free will, and a lot of times we're stupid sheep and make stupid decisions.
"My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever."
Psalm 73:26
Earlier today when I read this, I just had to sit and let it sink in. Even though I will mess up, and I am a sinner, and I make mistakes, there is someone that won't ever fail, and someone who can fix what I mess up. And that isn't just ANY someone-Guys, it's the God of the universe. And there's something so stinking comforting about that.
But here's where the control comes in.
I've definitely had to let go of my pride these past couple weeks. Because I've had to realize that there really isn't anything I can do with my sin on my own. I can't change myself without the help of Christ-and so often getting help from Him means surrendering complete control, and swallowing my pride long enough to tell Jesus that I trust He'll take care of whatever sin, whatever junk I have.
And He will.
Because He's God.
And he is SO much greater than me.
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